NHBPM- Day 27

“I bet you didn’t know…”

My favorite animal is a polar bear.

My favorite color is pink.

I adore anything fuzzy and/or polka dotted.

I have a severe sweet tooth and I love to snack. If I had to pick between three meals or snacks throughout the day, I would choose the latter.

Right before my diabetes diagnosis I went through two bags of almonds and a jar of peanut butter. In a week and a half. I lost 15 pounds. Then I gained it all back after starting on insulin. Think about the calories!! I wish….

Speaking of peanut butter. I don’t buy it anymore because I will eat it by the spoon.

I’m not a fan of Will Ferrell.

I choose Backstreet Boys over N’Sync but Hanson above anyone else.

2013 contains my lucky number (13) and is also my birth date 2/13. I’m thinking that’s a good sign for the upcoming year!

I feel lucky every day for the life I have. Through weight gain because of my thyroid to grumpy moods because of high blood sugar, I always keep in mind that it could be worse. Tragedies happen every day to all types of people. Struggles, successes, failures and achievement. Love, anger, sadness and happiness. My life is far from perfect, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.

“Bitch Bad, Woman Good”

Lupe Fiasco’s new music video for “Bitch Bad” premiered yesterday. Before listening, I really had no idea what this song would be about. Knowing it was Fiasco, I thought it had to be something pretty intelligent, but with the pre-existing knowledge that being a “bad bitch” for many women is a source of pride, I really had no clue.

Of course, Fiasco didn’t disappoint. I’ve listened to the song a few times throughout the morning and am continually analyzing it each time. The video (which you definitely need to watch) and the song itself is broken up into three “acts.” Each act builds upon the other until the very end when the listener realizes that there is a vicious cycle happening with men and women that they themselves can probably relate to because it is perpetuated by the media every day.

For those reading who may not be familiar with the term “bad bitch,” it’s defined by Urban Dictionary as a woman who essentially has her life together and looks good. In most contexts, it’s a good thing. A lot of popular songs talk about “bad bitches” in a way that seems empowering, despite the fact that women are being called “bitches.”

The first act in the song is about a little boy whose mother refers to herself as a bad bitch. Essentially, the woman who cares for him is “skew[ing] respect for dishonor,” leaving him with the idea that a “bitch” is “bad” and his mom isn’t a bitch.

So, we have the little boy who will grow up into a man with the idea that a bitch is bad and bad bitches are bad. The second part of the song is about pre-teen girls listening to and watching songs about “bad bitches.” In their minds, though, a “bad bitch” is what they want to be when they get older. The women in the music videos are what they strive to look like and how they want to act as they grow up.

The third act is where the boy and the girl, with their ideas about bad bitches, come together. He sees a “bad bitch” and she thinks she’s a “bad bitch” but the meaning is different for the two of them.

“Just like that, you see the fruit of the confusion
He caught in a reality, she caught in an illusion
Bad mean good to her, she really nice and smart
But bad mean bad to him, bitch don’t play your part
But bitch still bad to her if you say it the wrong way
But she think she a bitch, what a double entendre”

The message of this song really speaks to society’s perceptions as far as the media goes. I do wonder when being called a “bitch” became a source of pride for so many women, especially when coupled with the word “bad.”Although, I guess it’s the same as groups of women who have become empowered by the word “cunt.” Instead of letting “bitch” or “cunt” destroy these groups of women, they take it and wear it proudly. I see both sides to the positive and negative connotations of the term “bad bitch” but it’s important to remember that not everyone does. And that’s when the problems start.

Check out the video and let me know what you think:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jqFJ8LArRlY

Perspective

April 4th… the last time I posted! What. The. Heck.

Ok, I really can’t get that upset about it. I have been busy. But I also haven’t been that busy. I’ve been going through a lot of stuff lately and I kind of checked out of a lot of things in my life. But I’m back.

To update everyone on the biggest piece of news in my life as of late, I got a new job! I’m now working at an IT Recruiting company called Jobspring Partners as their Marketing Specialist. What does that entail? A lot of Twitter and tech blogs. Also a lot of meetups and organization. It’s a lot of fun and definitely a great job to get my foot back into the marketing and public relations world. I’m really just trying to learn as much as I can and have fun with everything.

In addition to being crazy busy at work, I’m also trying to self-improve. I’ve spent a lot of time annoyed at frivolous things and a lot less grateful than I should be. I have an amazing life. I was going through a rough period for a while with a few relationships, including the relationship I have with myself, but I feel like I’m starting to get back on track with everything.

Sometimes you need to just take a step back, stop and re-evaluate.

That’s what I did. It wasn’t pretty what happened after. A mental smack in the face and I hit the ground running with a “goals” list. Mostly, I wanted to get back to my positive, go-getter self. So I made a list of things I want to accomplish including cooking more (when did I stop?!), exercising more, cleaning regularly, reading, blogging. I also made a list of the positives in my life. I made a list of things I was going to do to develop deeper relationships with the people in my life. I made a list of my flaws, and yet another list about how to cope with those “flaws.” My goal through all of this is to be more at peace with myself and happier. I’m already well on my way.

To go with my new life goals, I’m reading “The Happiness Project” stolen from my Mom. If you haven’t read it, it’s about a woman who spends a year doing things to improve her happiness. That’s the extreme basic premise of the book. The bigger point I think she is trying to make is that a lot of people lead really great lives but spend so much time getting caught up in the tiny, unimportant details. They get bogged down in their unhappiness when it should be the opposite. I’m only a few chapters in but have already taken so much away.

And to end, a quote by one of my favorite actresses, Zooey Deschanel. Perfectly fitting.

“Being tender and open is beautiful. As a woman, I feel continually shhh’ed. Too sensitive. Too mushy. Too wishy washy. Blah blah. Don’t let someone steal your tenderness. Don’t allow the coldness and fear of others to tarnish your perfectly vulnerable beating heart. Nothing is more powerful than allowing yourself to truly be affected by things. Whether it’s a song, a stranger, a mountain, a rain drop, a tea kettle, an article, a sentence, a footstep, feel it all – look around you. All of this is for you. Take it and have gratitude. Give it and feel love.”